What is Sexual Health?
What is Sex?
Sex means different things to different people. Above all, it is a healthy and natural activity. It is something most people enjoy and find meaningful even if they create meaning in different ways.
Whether you are straight, lesbian, gay, bisexual, queer or questioning, you have the right to decide what sex means to you.
Are you unsure about your sexual interests? Are you curious about what you might enjoy? Are you wondering if you are ready for sex? These kinds of questions are perfectly normal!
Sex is not just vaginal* intercourse. Sex is pretty much anything that feels sexual. How YOU choose to define sex might be a moving target during your teen years. Your sexual interests may change over time, and that’s okay too.
I find it hard to talk about sex. Is there anything I can do to make it easier?
If you have questions about this topic, feel free to contact Planned Parenthood. [Link]
*We know that these aren’t the words everyone uses for their bodies (eg. trans folks), and support you using the language that feels best for you.
Whether you are straight, lesbian, gay, bisexual, queer or questioning, you have the right to decide what sex means to you.
Are you unsure about your sexual interests? Are you curious about what you might enjoy? Are you wondering if you are ready for sex? These kinds of questions are perfectly normal!
Sex is not just vaginal* intercourse. Sex is pretty much anything that feels sexual. How YOU choose to define sex might be a moving target during your teen years. Your sexual interests may change over time, and that’s okay too.
I find it hard to talk about sex. Is there anything I can do to make it easier?
- A simple place to start the chat is with yourself.
- Take some time to privately explore all parts of your own body. While you are at it, think about what thoughts, fantasies and sensations feel good for you and how you might like to experience sexual pleasure with someone else.
- Yes, this is definitely ok. Only you can decide what feels right for you when it comes to sex.
- You have the right to say no to sex. No one can or should force you to do something that doesn’t feel right.
- If, for example, vaginal sex is not something you want to do, there are many other ways to explore your sexuality and enjoy a fun and loving relationship with someone else
- Sexual activity is any activity that is considered sexual by the people who are involved. It can include the following activities and more:
- vaginal sex
- anal sex
- hugging
- kissing
- any sexual touching
- oral sex
- exposing your body to another person
- and more!
- Putting on external condoms, or using glove or dental dams.
- Making sex feel good.
- How to talk about sex with a partner.
- Negotiating consent and knowing more about why it’s very important.
- Masturbation.
- Oral, anal, and vaginal sex.
If you have questions about this topic, feel free to contact Planned Parenthood. [Link]
*We know that these aren’t the words everyone uses for their bodies (eg. trans folks), and support you using the language that feels best for you.
Am I Ready?
You’ve got sex on the brain, but you’re not sure you’re ready.
You’re not the only one! Having sex can be a major step in your life and it deserves some thought and planning. Everyone is different and only you can decide what’s best for you.
Here are some questions that may help you explore whether you and your partner feel ready to have sex. You may be surprised at some of your answers.
What is the right age to have sex?
Sex, like any other skill, takes practice. Try not to freak out if things don’t go perfectly the first time. Good sex is a lifelong experience and can be lots of fun if you play safe, relax and enjoy yourself.
If you have questions about this topic, feel free to contact Planned Parenthood [Link]
*We know that these aren’t the words everyone uses for their bodies (e.g. trans folks), and support you using the language that feels best for you.
You’re not the only one! Having sex can be a major step in your life and it deserves some thought and planning. Everyone is different and only you can decide what’s best for you.
Here are some questions that may help you explore whether you and your partner feel ready to have sex. You may be surprised at some of your answers.
What is the right age to have sex?
- There is no one right age to have sex. People engage in sexual activity at many different times during their life.
- Some people have their first sexual experience when they are very young or wait till they are much older.
- Is this the right time for me?
- Am I comfortable with my own body?
- What do I know about sex? Have I done my homework? Do I know the difference between sex myths and sex facts?
- Do I know how to protect myself from unplanned pregnancy and/or sexually transmitted infections (STIs)?
- Do I feel safe and comfortable with my partner?
- Am I feeling pressured into having sex?
- Am I attracted to my partner?
- What are my boundaries? What activities am I not comfortable with?
- What are my hopes and fears about sex?
- How do we feel about sex? What are our hopes for the experience? Are they the same?
- Have we had any negative experiences with sex in the past?
- Do we have any fears or worries about sex?
- Do we feel safe and comfortable with each other?
- Do we need protection against unplanned pregnancy and/or STIs and if so, what type will we choose?
- Have we talked about the words we want to use for our body parts?
- Do we expect our relationship will change after we have sex? How?
- Are we okay if one partner decides to stop when we are having sex?
- What kind(s) of sex do we want to have (e.g. vaginal*, oral, anal, etc.)?
- What sexual position(s) will we explore?
- Will our sexual exploration include activities like role play, sex toys, restraints, power play, blindfolds, spanking, etc.?
- Is this a casual, one-time encounter or will we continue to have sex?
- Take time to think ahead and decide what form of birth control (if applicable) or STI protection you will use, if any. Make sure you both know how to use it properly.
- While having sex, tell your partner with words or gestures about what feels good and what doesn’t.
- Don’t pretend to enjoy something because you’re afraid of hurting your partner’s feelings. This may encourage them to continue doing what you don’t enjoy and can end up hurting both your feelings.
- Be prepared to change your mind! If at any point things don’t seem right for you or your partner, stop, slow down, take a break or decide to wait a bit.
- If you are doing something where one partner is allowed to control the other, make sure you have a safe word that when spoken, can stop or change the kind of sex or play that is happening.
Sex, like any other skill, takes practice. Try not to freak out if things don’t go perfectly the first time. Good sex is a lifelong experience and can be lots of fun if you play safe, relax and enjoy yourself.
If you have questions about this topic, feel free to contact Planned Parenthood [Link]
*We know that these aren’t the words everyone uses for their bodies (e.g. trans folks), and support you using the language that feels best for you.
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Sexual Health pages retrieved from:Planned Parenthood Toronto. (2020). Sexual Health Factsheets. Retrieved September 14, 2021, from http://ppt.on.ca/education/facts/